Journey of the Heart ~♥~

Most of my life was spent raising my three children. I was a stay-at-home mom for 22 years and have been divorced for 15. My daughter, was a rehabilitation therapist before she was diagnosed with cancer. She is married to a firefighter/paramedic. They have two daughters. My oldest son enjoys traveling around the world and works on generators. My youngest son works in New Media.

After my divorce I tried to pursue a Masters in Computer Education. I have a Bachelor of Science from Indiana University. My goal was to equip adults with the technical skills necessary for returning to the modern workplace. Unfortunately, I became too ill to continue in the Masters program. After years of struggle it became necessary for me go on disability. I live with constant pain and illness.

I had vitek proplast-teflon implants placed in my face after a jaw injury . They were defective, contaminated, and recalled by the FDA. There is documentation that this company knew these implants would cause devastation of catastrophic proportions. In some people it actually ate through their skull and became imbedded in their brain. Within 3 months the implants had eroded the bones in my face and gone through my bloodstream affecting my entire body causing an autoimmune response. The implants were removed after 5 years, but not before the toxins devastated my body.

Most people find it difficult to believe what I am dealing with since I usually have a smile on my face. Trust me it is far less painful to be joyful than negative, bitter, and focused on your pain. I choose to be thankful for what I have and not to be complaining about what I do not have or can not do. Yes, there are days I am sad and lonely, days when I am delirious from the pain, days I don’t have the strength to feed myself…let alone make it to the store if I am out of food.

Yet, with all this I choose to be joyful and content in the Lord. For…the joy of the Lord is my strength. Every day is a struggle, but I will continue to praise the Lord. In His presence there is joy. In His presence there is peace. In His presence there is freedom from pain. Even though life is a struggle, I know I can endure when I am walking close to God through His son Jesus Christ. That is where I find peace, that is where I find love, and that is where I find contentment. I might be crying on the outside, but in my soul there is joy...

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” Romans 12:12

I try to blog and share when I have the strength. I write two blogs, Bren's Blog and Journey of the Heart. I contribute on HeartCry.