Most of my life was spent raising my three
children. I was a stay-at-home mom for 22 years and have been divorced for some time.
Have you ever felt like something is missing? You are saved and yet you don't feel whole? Maybe you no longer feel the joy and victory that was once prominent in your life. I have been feeling like that lately. This has been a very difficult season for me. I have been trying to write for days. I have several topics started and never got the freedom to finish.
I have prayed...read scripture...cried out to the Lord...seeked His Face...still it alluded me. Little by little the Lord has been guiding me... leading me. First I changed the name of the blog to "Journey of the Heart." I began thinking it would just be a compliment to "HeartCry"...then realized no...it is a journey of the heart.
I needed to go back to where my journey detoured and allow the Holy Spirit to clean and restore my heart. Years ago the Lord gave me a teaching on the heart that I shared with a group of ladies I was teaching. I have an outline and notes, but I never completed the teaching. The enemy attacked. My husband left me and I have spent years in a whirlwind on a detoured journey.
As I was going through the notes my eyes open to how it all fits together. I kept seeing "feed my sheep." Then when I went back later and looked at my notes I realized it wasn't written anywhere. The Lord wanted to bring to my attention a message he had given me years ago...
I believe I was feeling the emptiness and lack of love in my marriage...so in my hurt and pain I called out to Jesus..."Do you love me?" Father..."Do you love me?" Then the Lord spoke to my spirit, "Brenda, Do you love me? Feed my sheep." I wanted comforting and he called me to service.
He knew being focused on myself was never going to fill the emptiness and give me the love I desired. He knew as we share God's love it returns back and we learn to love God even more. So, here I am...finally surrendered to the call...finally surrendered to to the journey of healing my heart and sharing the lessons I have learned along the way.
I would love to have you follow along as I begin the "Journey of my Heart."
January 21, 2011 at 5:54 AM
Mmmm... so true, Brenda. I just love that "heart" you write about. It is easy to see Who resides there : )
I saw a beautiful country road, as I was reading. I saw pot-holes, ruts, and a couple scary places steep on both sides. As I continued reading, you brought my attention back up to where I was headed... back out on the horrizon. I could almost see "home"... hehe
I love you. Tks
January 21, 2011 at 7:09 AM
What a beautiful post...candid and heartfelt. I look forward to following you on your journey. Oftentimes when we feel begin to feel empty and lonely, even as believers knowing our God is always there for us..it's a time where we are being stretched and growing in our faith. I believe service to others is a beautiful expression of devotion towards God and carrying out of His will..and it brings great peace and healing to those who serve as well as blessings to others.
~may you walk in the light and love of our Father today :)
January 21, 2011 at 8:59 AM
I was watching a Simple Truth video on dancing in the rain when I came over to here. I do believe you are dancing in the rain and through it all God has prepared you to open your heart, which you did beautifully, and share the dance with us. We shall all be blessed by your Journey of the Heart.
Go with it, girl, God has blessed you.
http://www.danceintherainmovie.com/
January 24, 2011 at 3:52 AM
Thank you all for the beautiful words of encouragement. They touched my heart...I am honored and blessed by your comments! How wonderful you are choosing to go on this journey with me. God bless you!