Journey of the Heart ~♥~

I was watching Grey's Anatomy "Shiny Happy People" on hulu.com and starting thinking about the insanity of chronic pain. A young girl was brought into the hospital because she tried to scratch her eyes out and commit suicide. She was in so much pain and delirium they thought she was Schizophrenic. It turned out she had pressure induced vertigo from a small hole in her inner ear causing her to hear every sound in her body and every sound outside her body was magnified.

Living with chronic pain is not only an assault on your body it is an assault on your mind. The un-relentless torture of agony, limitations, and lack of understanding brings many people to utter despair. It makes you want to scratch your eyes, tear your hair, or blow your brains out. The mind is more fragile than your body and without a strong faith it is almost impossible to maintain. Even then, it is almost impossible to continue without prayer support. Moses needed Joshua and Aaron to hold his arms up when he was too weak to carry on. And so people with chronic pain need to reach out.

Dear Friends, I am reaching out in the mist of my insanity and pain asking for prayer...asking for help...asking for understanding. It is so difficult for me to write and yet that is the very thing God keeps calling me to do. He keeps giving me all these messages to share and they are stuck in my brain...stuck with a body too painful to spend time on the computer...stuck with fingers that keep typing gobble de goop. I pray to heal my body or stop asking me to write...and He has chosen neither. He simple spoke to my spirit and explained you are here to learn to completely rely upon Me.

It is only by His Grace and with His Anointing I am able write anything. Without His Anointing it is like driving in the mist of a raging storm. You can barely see the road, but somehow with prayer manage to get to your destination. Yes, you got to where you were going, but not without a lot of stress and very slowly. Sometimes you just have to stop, pull over, and wait for the storm to pass. That is what my brain is like, dear friends, and my storm never passes. I am grateful for His Anointing. I am grateful I have these moments of lucidity, but I would love to be able to function day to day and just simply chat with my friends.

I have learned to have a grateful and positive perspective. I am being REAL. When you have everything taken away from you it is a choice how you are going to respond. I choose to be thankful for what I have and not to be complaining about what I do not have or can not do. Yes, there are days I am sad and lonely, days when I am delirious from the pain, days I don’t have the strength to feed myself…let alone make it to the store if I am out of food. Yet, with all this I choose to be joyful and content in the Lord. For…the joy of the Lord is my strength. Every day is a struggle, but I will continue to praise the Lord.

In His presence there is joy. In His presence there is peace. In His presence there is freedom from pain. It’s a choice and even though I might be crying on the outside…in my soul there is joy.

“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” Romans 12:12

Where hatred resides,
Let love prevail.
When hatred prevails,
Have love reside. 

I awoke to the Lord speaking those words to my spirit one morning. It seems there is so much hatred in the world today, whether it is one religion against another, one denomination against another or one believer against another. Even in our own personal life it is so difficult not to respond to hatred with hatred.

Our nature wants validation for the injustice we think has been imposed upon us. As if hating them back somehow childishly takes the pain away or evens the score. You might think I don't hate, but how do you behave when someone cuts in front of you, is rude and inconsiderate, when you are just plain tired and no one seems to care. If you are not responding in love, you are responding in hate.

To respond in love is difficult merely in the fact that it is a choice, a choice contrary to our nature, contrary to our desires, contrary to our logic. It is however, the very nature of God. So where does that leave us? To choose God is to choose love. To choose to overcome the pain of our rejection and draw in those that shut you out. It is so easy to forget that we are the ones drawing the circle around our own life, not anyone else. Therefore, we can choose to make our circle as small or large as we want it to be.

"He drew a circle that shut me out-
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But Love and I had the wit to win
We drew a circle that took him in."
-Edwin Markham, Outwitted

One time I passed a person who had been particularly cruel to me and I cried out to God "How can you expect me to love these people." I was overwhelmed by His response. He merely spoke to my spirit and said, "How can you expect me not to love them." Then I realized that to know God is to love His beloved. For where hatred resides there is all manner of evil things.

We need to realize our battle is not against individuals, but a spirit of hate, not only in the world, but our very nature. Only when we allow God to transform our nature can we respond in love. We need to let love prevail and reside in our lives. I don't think we comprehend how powerful love can be, nor what it actual should be! I truly believe that love is the most powerful weapon we have against the powers of darkness.

The problem is that we have to learn what it is and how to weld it. God has been trying to teach me, it has been difficult, but I am learning. I believe Love is about treating people with honor and respect unconditionally, even when they are not loveable. Not sardonically saying "I love you with the love of Christ", then walking away and act unloving.

Love can't operate in un-forgiveness, anger, strife, jealousy, lust, or anything contrary to the love of God. Right now God is teaching me how critical it is to have control over what I say. I believe a significant aspect of love is expressed by our words; therefore, it is imperative that they be under the control of God. As anything, once you learn something you can only grow if you continue to practice it.

"Love is patient,
Love is kind.
It does not envy,
It does not boast,
It is not proud,
It is not rude,
It is not self-seeking,
It is not easily angered,
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
Always trusts,
Always hopes,
Always perseveres."
1Corinthians 13:1-7

Where [a place] hatred [hate-bad temper, to trouble, to dislike or wish to avoid; hatred-a state, condition/strong dislike or ill will] resides [to dwell for a long time, to be vested, have rights, powers], Let [implies power or authority to give or deny consent] love [a deep and tender feeling of affection for or attachment or devotion to a person or persons, a feeling of brotherhood and goodwill toward other people] prevail [be strong, gain the advantage, victory, be more widespread], When [a time] hatred prevails, Have [to own or control, gain possession or control] love reside. 

The love that was lost in the evening time,
Shall be restored again.
The burned out candle in the night,
Shall be ignited again.

To wander through the darkness,
Only draws us closer to Him.
The Love that never leaves us,
The Light that is never dim.

So...Take comfort in the knowledge,
Of His enduring Grace.
To be there right beside us,
To shine upon our face.

by~bren

Easter is a highly celebrated occasion all around the world. Sometimes it is easy to get caught up in the secular trappings of bunnies, candies, and new dresses. Even traditional church attendance can be void of the very essence of what we are celebrating. Easter is the sacred celebration of Christ's resurrection from the dead. For the Christian, It is truly something to be happy about, it was the greatest expression of love in all of eternity. "For God so loved the world that he gave His one and only son." Jesus Christ is God fitted into human flesh to demonstrate God's love for us.

When the soldiers taking Jesus' body down from the cross stabbed him with a spear point, "blood and water came out". That rush of fluids revealed what may have been the actual final cause of death for Jesus...a burst aorta. Jesus died of a broken heart. The breaking of Jesus' heart was what "finished" Jesus' sacrifice. On Easter morning the great surprise is that sacrifice was not the end of Jesus' mission. Out of Jesus' broken heart there emerged a new heart, a resurrected heart, an unbreakable, unstoppable heart. A heart overflowing with love beyond our understanding.

Jesus' life, ministry, torture and death were planned before the creation of the world in order to redeem the hearts of mankind and demonstrate God's love for us. God in the person of Jesus Christ identified so closely with every human being who had ever lived or who ever would live that all of our pains, sicknesses, failures, sorrows, lies, rebellions, transgressions, hatreds and murders...all the brokenness of humanity...became Jesus' while He hung upon that Roman cross outside of Jerusalem.

So when you think about resurrection from now on, don't just think about the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ as historical facts that make your Christian faith possible. Please believe that the same God that raised Christ from the dead has not only raised you up from the death of separation from God, but this same power gave you a new heart and will live in you for all eternity.

It seems many people are going through a very difficult season these days. Whether from financial difficulties, stressed relationships, or poor health the sources are endless; the need for a change of season epidemic.
Too many are suffering in a winter of discontent. Do we just endure the long winter or can we change the season. Daniel 2:21 says God can "change times and seasons." If you don't like the season you are in... change it.

So, how do we change the season? If I can take liberty with Shakespeare..."Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this son of [God]. Through Christ our winter is made a glorious summer. The presence of the Lord will bring us times of refreshing in the midst of our drought.

"Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord," (Acts 3:19)

To change our season we need to repent and be converted so that our sins may be blotted out that a new season "may "[is allowed] come. To repent means "to change one's mind" (Webster.)
If we change our mind...the Lord will change your season. He will change the winter of our discontent into glorious summer. When we change our mind...our thinking... we don't change the winter...we change the discontent!

We still have financial difficulties, stressed relationships, or poor health, but through Christ we can change our mourning into dancing. Through Christ we can choose to be joyful and content in the Lord. For…the joy of the Lord is my strength. We can change our discontent, our whining, and complaining into rejoicing.

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" (Philippians 4:4)

You are to rejoice always, because joy is the easiest fruit to lose. You can't live off of the joy you had yesterday. Joy can give you strength only when you possess it. Yet you need to rejoice always because if you don't then you lose the strength to fight when facing trials.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds." (James 1:2)

Why is it pure joy whenever we face trials? Because joy gives you strength to fight in the midst of your trials. So by rejoicing, you have victory over your trials. When you change your thinking from despair to rejoicing...you can change your season.

Are you facing a challenge or difficulty that seems overwhelming? When you stand strong and remain faithful to God, He promises to set your course for victory! And victory doesn’t necessarily mean everything is going to go our way all the time or work out the way we planned.

The Bible says that the real battle we face isn’t in our circumstances, it’s in our minds. The enemy is after your thoughts. He’s after your peace and joy. He knows that when you have peace, it’s a sign that you are connected to the Father. When you hold on to your peace and choose to be joyful, you are walking in victory, and it’s just a matter of time before your circumstances line up!

Remember, God knew every person who would wrong you, and He’s already laid out your vindication. God knew every disappointment, and He’s already laid out new opportunities. God knew everything that would be stolen, and He has already laid out your restoration. Rejoice today knowing that He has set your course for victory in every area of your life!

"He holds victory in store for the upright, He is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for He guards the course of the just and protects the way of His faithful ones" (Proverbs 2:7-8)

Heavenly Father, thank You for the victory You have in store for me. I choose to be faithful; I choose to walk humbly before You. I stand in faith knowing You are working all things together for my good because You love me. In Jesus´ Name. Amen.

On this Saint Patrick's Day instead of asking if you are wearing your green... the question should be... Are you "green" with envy?

Do you begrudge another’s good fortune because you feel the good fortune should have been yours? Does it make you uncomfortable when someone has more acclaim, prestige, or possessions than you? Do you ever speak with contempt, or unkindness, or severity about someone with more than you? Do you have any tinge of satisfaction when someone who has more than you is "brought down?" Do you carry old grudges?

Envy/covetousness is one of the deadly sins to which no one readily confesses and yet it is rare to find anyone completely free of its grasp. "You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor." Exodus 20:17

Envy will always destroy relationships. Often it is a relative who seems to be the most envious and this person can drive families apart. Envious people often tear down another’s accomplishments by belittling or sometimes subtly uttering well-aimed negative comments. Have you ever gone to a person to share good news? The look of ambivalence you received lets you know you hit an “envy nerve.”

Envy is counting another's blessings instead of your own. If you are honest with yourself, everyone would have to admit they have experienced envy at some point in their life. It's the battle with our flesh that wants to say "what about me." However, if you simply are unable to bear the good fortune of others then "the green-eyed monster" has captured your heart.

What spirit do you now find as you search your heart? Individuals attempting to deal with problems of jealousy and envy should strive for critical and realistic evaluation of their own capabilities, both positive and negative. After making the evaluation, they should then give thanks for their strengths and recognize that it is usually impossible to possess everything in life that is valued.

"Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other." Galatians 5:24-26.

Lord give me the strength,
To keep loving.
Keep my heart open only to you.
Help me shower all your love,
Like the rain from above,
Not be squandered away without you.

Lord give me the strength,
To keep caring.
Keep my mouth open only for you.
Help me spread only your word,
To those who haven't heard,
Not be carelessly spoken without you.

Lord give me the strength,
To be quiet.
Keep my ears open only to you.
Help me hear all of your word,
So I can share what I heard,
Not be loud and distracted without you.

Lord give me the strength,
To be humble.
Keep my eyes open only to you.
Help me to grow in your love,
Shining from heaven above,
Not be proud and self-centered without you.

by~bren

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13